stumbling towards coherence

DASMTT

2009-03-31T14:09:00.002-05:00

This weekend I have the privilege of participating in the first Dallas Area Student Ministry Think Tank. One of my closest friends Brian Rayburn has gathered 12 youth pastors from the state of Texas (plus South Carolina and California) to participate in a panel that examines multiple facets of student ministry, and looks at how these things will need to be addressed in the next decade of student ministry. My paper/presentation examines how student ministries need focus on building a culture driven by spiritual transformation and discipleship instead of attractional events and behavior modification. I'm definitely the young nobody on the panel, but that excites me because I am going to hear from some extremely bright, experienced student pastors. I don't know what topics the other guys were assigned, but I know we will be examining leveraging new technological mediums through SM, gender and sexuality, parent and family ministry and education. Fellowship Dallas is hosting our Think Tank, and I can't wait to get there.

Something New Next Week

2009-03-26T13:58:00.002-05:00

We are doing something different this week at Connect on Wednesday Night-I have no idea how it's going to go. Throughout lent, our Wednesday Night High School Program has been focusing on living our lives the way Jesus did in a few key ways. (sacrifice, love, prayer) This week we are looking at worshiping God the way Jesus did. The main avenue of instruction on Wednesday Night for us has been small group discussions led by ministry leaders, and that's going to stay the same, but we are going to add 30 minutes at the end to allow the students to Worship God intentionally for 30 minutes. We are going to provide different avenues to do this, musically led worship from one of our talented college students, a large piece of butcher paper for them to do art on, some journals, and maybe a few other creative options. I've never done anything like this before, even though the experiential model has been the hot way to go in ministry for awhile now. Teaching and preaching will always be the primary means our ministry communicates the truth of the Gospel, but I'm excited to see how this week plays itself out in the hearts of our students.

Stewardship

2009-03-25T15:46:00.002-05:00

Money has always been a scary issue for me. That's probably because I'm bad at math and spend too much of it. Jesus talks about money consistently in the Gospels because it's importance and ability to own us. Money is spiritual, and because we have been called to lead people in how they manage their money, it's important that we manage it well ourselves. Last month, we made our last credit card payment and are 100% out of debt. We don't have car payments, student loans, we rent, and have zero credit card debt. I'm not going back! The freedom we walk in financially now has been like a burden lifted off of me. There is still a strong tug for stuff I feel that got me into credit card trouble in the first place, and a strong desire within me to push back on that. I'm thankful for the many blessings God has given us to allow my family some financial freedom, and I pray that we will obey God in how he calls us to use what he has blessed us with.

Xbox and Boxers

2009-03-16T14:54:00.003-05:00

I was able to hang out at North Greenville University this morning with one of our ministry leaders, Dr. Robert Boggs (he teaches there). Aside from spending some time talking to Dr. Johnson, the head of their theology department, I was in the chapel service where Dr. Daniel Akin, president of Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary preached the message. Dr. Johnson and I walked in a few minutes into the sermon, but the section I heard was unbelievably convicting. Dr. Akin was teaching on the subject of the Christian life as one of consecration and sacrifice, and he went into detail about the importance of world missions. What really hit home was his take on the current state of world missions in the IMB. After using two specific examples, he made the point that IMB teams in the most difficult missions fields on earth (western africa and the middle east) are made up of 80% women. Where are the men? He went on to lovingly scold the men, telling them to stop sitting in their boxer shorts playing xbox. We can all agree that college guys waste time and generally act like morons right? But here is where he convicted me-the median age of video game players is now 34. It's not just college guys that are wasting their lives on trivial pursuits. The adult men in the church have a stake in this as well. Maybe it's not video games, but the majority of men I know (including myself) have hobbies that take up a fairly big chunk of our time, energy and passion that hold very little real value. Whether it's mastering HALO or being a scratch golfer (neither of which is inherently bad) we as men are so caught up in periferal pursuits that we are not living lives centered around the mission of the church. We (me included) have to repent and reprioritize our time, passion and energy to be kingdom focused.

Farming

2009-03-13T20:51:00.004-05:00

I've struggled maintaining this blog with any consistency, sometimes because I'm busy and sometimes because I just don't have any thing meaningful to say, and there is enough of that out there without my contribution. The picture of ministry painted for aspiring American ministers (at least in my experience) through books, some teachers, and some pastors is a good one. We will live lives of fulfillment, enact change, are admired, make good money, and do all of this in a comfortable setting. The picture painted by scripture (as well as generations of Church history) looks different. For me, growing up as the evangelical church kid who was in a pew any time the doors were open, the idea of ministry was incredibly attractive. I dress stylishly (my wife might disagree with me), I'm fairly outgoing, can be funny (again, my wife might have a different take on that), know my bible relatively well, can play messy games, and make cool fliers. When I felt called into the ministry and began to read books by guys that were a little ahead of me in their journey of service to the kingdom, I liked the picture some of them painted. Given my above listed qualifications, I could jump in, work hard, and wait for the numbers to blow up. (because that's how it works in this particular painting) Quick growth can and does happen, but that's not the norm. The New Testament consistently uses farming metaphors in relation to ministry. This has proven to be a much more accurate, frustrating picture of ministry in my life. It's been frustrating because I am not a patient person. I grew up in the 90's, and don't have to wait for anything. My generation gets what we want when we want it, so when I teach, I want instant conversions! When small groups start, I want Instant Sanctification, not progressive. The problems that arise in that attitude are obvious, and 100% part of my maturing process. As I embrace the long, hard work that ministry is, I'm beginning to experience how God uses my ministry for my sanctification along with the sanctification of others.

Men Leading Out

2008-11-10T10:48:00.004-06:00

God is very clear that Men were built to lead. We were made to lead our families and God's church toward Jesus. Unfortunately, we have neglected both of these divine Mandates in a major way. This is not to say that women are not amazing, capable and talented because they are all of those things. This is aimed specifically at men. Why aren't we leading and what are the consequences of our sin? I've read the books and the studies that tell of the "man vacum" in the church, but it hit home in a major way last thursday. We had the quarterly diocesan youth ministry meeting where all of the youth pastors in upper South Carolina get together and meet. There were eleven of us there. Out of the 11 there, only four were men and one of those guys is gay. (another post for another time) Where are all the men? I'm not saying that the only way men can be spiritual leaders is to be on staff on a church, but I am saying that for the most part, men in our country have abdicated our role as spiritual leaders within our families and within our local churches. Most men either aren't leading any where, or they are pouring their leadership energy into their job. Being faithful at work is Godly, but when work overtakes your family on your priority list, then you've fallen into the sin of idolatry. A lot of men don't plug in to lead at church because they put in 80 hour work weeks to keep their families in a sweet lifestyle. When did getting our families stuff become spiritual leadership? We've (men) almost completely abandoned leading ministries, writing it off as "something for the women to do". There are many men who do faithfully lead at church, but the numbers speak loudly to us. The majority of men are not being spiritual leaders within their families and communities. Anytime we forsake mandates God places on us, the consequences are horrible, both for us and those we are responsible for. Men, let's step up and lead.

what a week

2008-10-27T11:20:00.002-05:00

This last week has been trying. I don't write this to somehow make my minute problems important, even on my worst week, I understand I'm better off than 90% of the world simply because of where I live, I write this only to entertain the reader with my inconviences. I got a nasty case of bronchitis this past week. It hit me hard on Sunday. I had a fever, congestion, ear, throat, it was nasty. Just as I was feeling better saturday, I woke up at 4 Sunday morning with severe nasea and went to the bathroom and proceeded to vomit for 4 hours on and off. I was vomiting 100% pure snot that had drained into my stomach. I thought about snapping a picture with my dash to post on the blog, but didn't have the energy to pull my convulsing body off the floor to get it. I finally passed out after my stomach blew it's nose through my mouth, only to be awakened by my wife calling me from church (I didn't go, vomitsnot in the communion chalice is looked down upon) to tell me that I was not the only member of our family who was not functioning correctly. Her volvo wouldn't start and she was stranded at Church. So, a Dr.'s visit, perscription medicine and a new battery/rebuilt altrenator later we've seen our bank account mirror the stock market and crash. Fourtunanlty we've been smart and saved and we aren't in trouble. (I also have a grandfather who is always there to help us financially when we need it) Then upon walking into work this morning for the first time since thurday, I was greeted by about 20 rapidly fraying loose ends and a man with a ponytail named leslie who was cutting a huge hole in the back wall of my office. (they are adding another door to it) It's been a crazy few days.

fear

2008-10-05T14:22:00.000-05:00

Two months into my time @ christ church, a fear has begun to creep into my mind. That fear is birthed out of some early success. In the short time I've been here, I've built some good relationships with students, parents and volunteers. We've seen a marked increase in attendance, wednesday nights are entertaining, and there has been nothing but positive feedback about the changes in the ministry. The fear in me is rooted in the way we could grow. There is a part of me that worries that we will be a group that comes together and has fun, without ever knowing the treasure that is the kingdom of god. My soul is wrestling the with the fact that I have to completely rely on the presence of god in regards to everything, but specifically in the growth od our students. I pray that the Holy Spirit moves powerfully to impact lives through the Gospel of Jesus. I pray that we grow deeply and profoundly into Christ.

Communication

2008-09-25T13:57:00.003-05:00

I learn more about Jesus and Scripture through listening to a good sermon than through any other form of communication. But I'm the exception. I grew up in a church tradition that placed a very high value on the sermon. I work with students who grew up in a tradition that places the highest value on the communion and prayer. Neither is bad or wrong, but they are different. This presents a challenge for me, who is used to communicating the truth of God's word in a very traditional sermoneqsque format. The question is, how can I communicate the truth of the gospel to our students in innovative, relevant ways? I'm not advocating ending preaching, I'm just seeking to maximize the effects of the time we have with our students. Maybe we move to a small group, discussion driven wednesday night? Maybe something else? What are some innovative ways to communicate the gospel to young people?

Treasure

2008-09-23T14:38:00.003-05:00

I'm still excited and feeling energetic about what is happening at Christ Church on Wednesday Nights. We are in week 4 of entourage, and are going to be looking at why we follow Jesus. The disciples ask Jesus in Matthew 18 who will be the greatest, not understanding the ultimate goal of following Jesus. We don't follow Jesus because of what we get from him, we follow Jesus because Jesus is what we get. My prayer for our student ministry has and is that God opens our students eyes to the truth of the Gospel, and that irresistible grace inflames their souls with a passion to know and love God through the propitiation of Christ on the Cross. I hope they begin to want more than to check church off and live life for themselves. I want badly for the treasure that a relationship with Christ is becomes the focus of their lives and they glorify God. This week we will be exploring what Jesus means when he says that the disciples need to have faith like a child. We will talk about what it looks like to love God as a teenager in a culture that makes it so difficult to seek holiness and the person of Christ. Continue to pray for the souls of our students with me, that they would see God as loving King, and not angry cosmic killjoy. I pray God will make us excited about him.

The Scriptures

2008-09-18T09:37:00.002-05:00

I've got to teach the most difficult lesson I've ever taught on Sunday. I'm teaching our confirmation class this week, and the topic is "Why the Bible is the Source of Ultimate Truth". I'm a little intimidated to teach this because of what a weighty, complex issue that is to teach at all, but by the task of taking that and packaging it in a way that 15 and 16 year olds grasp it. I've been studying all week, and found some incredibly helpful stuff. The Resurgence website has a teaching by John Piper on Why he trusts the scriptures and that was amazing. Anyways, my hope for this teaching is that God uses it to inflame our students hearts to have a trust and a passion for his word. I pray that God draws them into an understanding of his word that excites them, and spurs them to viewing and using scripture as the foundation of their life, and not a boring obligation they have to listen to twice a Eucharist on Sunday. I'm excited to present the word of God to a group of students, but I have a great deal of trepidation about doing so accurately and clearly. God's word is not something I want to speak on erroneously. Pray God draws our students towards him, using his word in their lives, as a catalyst sending them into a relationship with him. And pray for my teaching to be concise, clear and relevant.

Who Do you Say that I am?

2008-09-17T12:18:00.003-05:00

We are in the full swing of entourage on wednesday nights. Tonight is 80's night complete with costume contest and music video karaoke. More importantly, we are in matthew 16:13-19, Peter's Confession. There was a lot of confusion about the identity of Christ during his earthly ministry. Nothing has changed. We live in a culture that is just as confused about the identity of Christ as the culture Jesus walked in. Who do people say that I am? That is the question Jesus asks his disciples in the text, and that is the question we will answer tonight. Who does culture say the Jesus is? Great teacher? Hippie? Rebel? More importantly we are going to answer the second question Christ poses to the disciples. Who do you say that I am? Our view of Christ has a direct correlation to how we follow him. Are we following a teacher? Are we following a philosopher? Are we following the living God who defeated sin and died to serve as a substituionary atonement for us? How does who you think Jesus is effect how you relate to him?

Home

2008-09-15T14:57:00.003-05:00

I love living in Greenville. I love our church, our home and our friends, but I still miss Dallas. Mainly, I miss my friends. While I was doing Seminary on Campus, I was blessed to have a group of about 8 friends who were very close with each other. We all had similar interests, goals and passions. I was able to connect with one of those guys on Sunday. He got married about a month before me, and has a very similar outlook on church, ministry, etc. as I do. After talking to him for about 20 minutes I realized how much I had left behind in Texas. I miss the camaraderie and accountability with guys like him. By the way, if you are reading this and you are in any type of leadership position in a church, this particular guy NEEDS to be on your radar. His name is Brian Rayburn, and he is on staff with the college ministry at Lakepointe after being a youth pastor at a very successful church in Asia. Listen to him teach via their podcast. Brian is the most gifted communicator I've ever known. If you are smart, you will find him and give him a position. Anyways, I'm excited to have friends like Brian. Guys who I'm going to do ministry with for the next 40 years. We're going to struggle with ministry, family and life together for a long time. Thank God for relationships.

Paradigm RE-Shift

2008-09-13T09:54:00.002-05:00

In the 70's/80's youth ministry began to really professionalize. The church saw a need to reach students for Christ, and knew they had to reach students differently than they would reach adults. Specifically, as the church's awareness of the need to reach unchurched people began to shift, the paradigm of youth ministry began to shift as well. Because the typical teenager that did not know Christ would never go to church on Sunday morning, we started Wednesday night programs that were innovative, creative and effective. Students who would never come to church to hear about Christ were now entering into a relationship with Jesus and becoming followers of him. After they were plugged into a Wednesday night ministry, as their faith grew, so did their tendency to go to church. The formerly unchurched student now loves Jesus and wants to grow his or her faith. Sunday School (if the church offered it) was the next step in his/her development. That model continues to be very effective, especially in non denominational churches that do such a great job of reaching the unchurched for Christ. A mid week program is a great way to reach unchurched students. I currently serve at a large, traditional, mainline denominational church, and we kicked off our mid week program called entourage two weeks ago, and it's been interesting to watch. Because of the vision and demographics of the bible churches I've been at, the question was always how do we reach the unchurched for Christ? The question that has arisen at Christ Church Greenville has been different, it's "How do we reach Churched Students for Christ?" A lot of students at our church (like any in the bible belt) go to church sunday because their parents make them. It's what is done in the south on sunday before football comes on television. Simply attending church no longer means some one follows Christ. The majority of our unreached students show up on sunday morning, not wednesday night. The wednesday nighters are serious enough about their faith to make the extra time at church a priority. This is a completely different paradigm than that seen in the "typical" American youth program. If we make Wednesday night the outreach level program, (which we have been doing) then the kids who are at the outreach level faith wise aren't going to come. The outreach level students are there on Sunday Morning. How do we eschew the traditional Sunday Morning Model in a way that we reach the students when they come? I feel like in the coming years here, we are going to explore changing the wednesday night paradigm. If we want to connect with the students who aren't committed followers of Christ, we are going to have to do it when they are going to come, which is Sunday morning. What does that look like? How can we re-invent Sunday Morning to connect our fringe students? What do you think?

Getting on the Same Page

2008-08-29T08:54:00.001-05:00

We had our annual parents meeting for this year's confirmation class. We confirm in the 10th grade @ Christ Church, and we are expecting a class of around 50 sophomores this year, and the crowd at the meeting last night reflected that. The crowd also reflected an oft overlooked challenge in youth ministry-Some parents (even church members) do not always hold to distinctly Christian beliefs. This is a problem for two reasons. The first is that if the parents themselves are not experiencing the truth of the Gospel, then they are missing the vitality and freedom found in living as a child of God. The second reason this is a problem is that despite what some misguided youth ministers would tell you, we (youth pastors) will never be the biggest influence on the students we serve, their parents will be. So no matter how well we teach, 20 minutes of good, orthodox teaching can be washed away with the dismissal of a parent. If we want our students to know Christ and walk with him, we have to work with the parents, and make sure we are on the same page theologically. The last thing we want is a Holy war being waged between parents and youth staff. Do your students parents think that Jesus is the only way to heaven? Do they believe that scripture is the inerrant, authoritative word of God? Do they place a higher emphasis on the prayer book or the bible? (I'll be honest, I'm a little afraid to ask this question) The hurdle of working on the same page with parents theologically speaking is raised a few notches higher for those of us in student ministry in my life stage. I'm very, very young for my job, and I realize the challenges that go along with that. Mainly, it is very difficult for parents in their 30's to 60's (and in our church VERY educated, successful 30 to 60 year olds) to ascribe ANY authority to the teaching of a 24 year old who some see as merely a babysitter who gives their kids a safe place to play twice a week. As we attempt to preach and teach to our parents, we have to keep in mind how we can appear to them, and we have to keep in mind that they DO have a TON of life experience we don't. We've got to approach them with respect and humility, and pray that the Holy Spirit moves them in the same direction we are leading their children. We don't have to let anyone look down on us because we are young, but we also have the responsibility to act in a way that does not GIVE people a reason to look down on us because of our youth.

Entourage Part 2

2008-08-28T09:31:00.002-05:00

We are pushing closer to launching our entourage series for the fall. As I dig deeper into the text we are using for the first week, more things about the disciples calling have surfaced. I love that Matthew Henry (what's up bibleworks) writes that before they were called by Christ, they were working at the calling they already had. Peter, Andrew, John and James were (at least the text seems to paint them as such) diligent workers, busting their rears in a hard job. They were about the business that had been appointed to them. They weren't sulking because they had a crappy job in the tatooine of the Middle East. They weren't lazy. They were working. Henry goes on to ask his readers "are you working in your calling?" Are we diligent working where we are? Do we display the characteristics of hard laborers, sweating and striving to do the difficult work of following Christ? The portrait our culture paints of vocational ministry often seems to mirror the picture it paints of corporate executives. And we like that. Who really dreams of hard manual labor for low pay? However, the men who Jesus called had the mindset of blue collar laborers. They understood what hard work was. It has caused me to ask, how can I LABOR for the kingdom? Where do I need to sweat more? Where have I gotten lazy?

What Happens?

2008-08-26T14:48:00.002-05:00

One of the things I've noticed about youth ministry the longer I've done it has little to do with my experience as a youth worker, but alot to do with my friends and I as we've gotten older. I went to a high school with a strong FCA program and a bunch of kids who went to church every sunday. They were pretty serious about God. Now, we're all done with college and are young professionals in some capacity. Over 40% of the kids that I knew from North that were church kids have walked away. They still retain that oh so american Deism, but the worship of Jesus Christ has gone the way of the rest of their juvenile mis-conceptions about the world. So, the challenge lies in how we fix the problem. It is a little scary to know that all the labor, prayer and time I put into even our most committed students could stop in four short years. Are we presenting Christianity in an in accurate way? Are they just into church because it's a place their parents let them hang out with their friends? Do they just love God because of his stuff? I'm not sure what happens in between graduation from 12th grade and graduation from college. Maybe the lack of connection with other Christians in college? Maybe they get a little freedom from home, and find that sin is fun. (I know I did) I know that every single Christian will struggle and stray from Christ, but what can we do when they are young to make sure they come back?

Entourage

2008-08-25T14:07:00.004-05:00

Our Wednesday night theme for the fall is "Entourage". We're going to examine the lives of Jesus' disciples and talk about what discipleship looks like for us. I started studying today for the first passage we're going to examine on September 10th. When Jesus called the disciples, he called men who were at the time completely and utterly unqualified. They had none of the abilities that the religous establishment of the time thought neccesary to do ministry. They very likely couldn't read. Also, this is just some conjecture from me, but I wonder how closely they "walked with God" before they met Jesus. Were they seekers? Were they serious Church guys? Where were they? My point is, Jesus didn't wait for them to be qualified before he called them. He didn't wait until they were spiritually mature (see Peter), he called them to ministry where they were knowing HE would be the one to mature and grow them, as they were incapable of doing it themselves. In the same vein, it's very easy for me to get discouraged in ministry. God has placed me in places of ministry where I've been surrounded my a lot of extremely talented mature men. There is still a lot I have to work on, and it's easy to get caught up in the feeling of "I'm not as good as ____, so I'm not going to be effective in my ministry" I find encouragement in the calling of the disciples, and I'm reminded that Jesus didn't call some future, perfect version of me to ministry. He called me as I am knowing HE would be there to grow and mature me as I obediently (most of the time) follow him. When I look at the people in scripture God chooses to use, I see a lot of murders, adulterers, a prostitute, illiterate blue collar guys, a terrorist and a traitor to his people. God uses screwed up people to do his work as he heals their spiritual wounds and grows them in maturity and wisdom. Thank God I don't have to do it myself. (because I couldn't)

Connect=Communication

2008-08-22T10:35:00.003-05:00

This Sunday is connect Sunday at Christ Church. I'm very excited. This Sunday all of the respective ministries will set up tables with information on every program they will roll out this fall, and advertise volunteer opportunities. For me, that means that we will have the monthly parent newsletter, 3x5's of the new Wednesday Night series advertising the kick off party on September 3rd, 3x5's with a summary of what is happening the rest of the year, two calenders and an informational packet on the ski trip we are taking in JANUARY. This has been a great process for me. Having to advertise this stuff in August means that it has to be planned a few months in advance. If we don't plan this stuff in advance, we can't communicate it in advance. How do you kill a youth ministries effectiveness? Don't tell people what you're doing until the last minute. To connect people to our ministry, we've got to communicate what is happening in the youth ministry to them. Parents want their kids involved, they just got to know what's going on. This second great thing about getting stuff planned to roll out in August is that you have more time to put it together. I want all of our programs to have a level of exellence to them. The better they are, the more effective they are. So, now we have the entire fall/winter on paper, to put in the hands of our parents and students, and now all we have left is to execute it.

Watching God

2008-08-20T19:13:00.000-05:00

I've been very blessed to be a part of some very succesful ministries as an intern. But, I came into those ministries long after they had built a strong momentum. Now, I am working in a ministry that is only a few years into things. I've been on the job about a month, and I'm getting to watch God work in huge ways right in front of my eyes. I'm amazed that as we move in the direction that we feel God leading us we have people come forward completely unsolicited asking to start things moving in the very direction we feel we are being led. Things are happening right in front of me and I get to see what a great, powerful, wonderfully perfect God I serve.

Growing Pains

2008-08-15T10:19:00.000-05:00

Marriage is difficult. I know everyone knows that. Let me tell you why marriage is difficult for me. I have a very strong desire to be perfect. I want to do everything exactly right. When you get to know people really well, you begin to see their flaws, and the better my wife knows me, the more she sees my shortcomings. Obvioulsy she loves me despite them, but she will bring them up and say, you might want to work on that. I don't want to work on things. I have a tendancy towards agression. If I have a problem with something, I'm usually less than subtle about it. I jump to conclusions about thing and react, instead of thoughtfully processing. I'm a very stereo-typical type A agressive guy. Sometimes that's good, but sometimes it's like a bull in a china shop. It is difficult for me to hear my wife say I need to change some things, but it's impossible not to listen.

Almost Home

2008-08-12T06:59:00.002-05:00

We've been in Greenville for almost a month now, and it's slowly starting to feel like home. My office is slowly coming together. I've met and connected with almost all of our youth ministry leadership, and connected with some students. Our apartment is basically unpacked. I'm listening to the ticket online. Things are starting to feel like home here. It's been a big adjustment for both of us and we haven't met as many people our age as we would've liked to by now, but I think we are slowly starting to thing of Greenville as home.

Money

2008-08-03T14:13:00.002-05:00

We are hanging out at Panera using their wireless. As we've been married, we've been doing all married logistics, and we just set up our first joint checking account!! I never knew how poor I was until I got married. We have been looking at out finances, and I've come to a conclusion. I spent too much on my credit card when I was single. We don't have a staggering amount of credit card debt. In fact, we should have it all knocked off in 4 months, worst case scenario. It helps that that is the only debt we have. Neither of us have student loans or debt to pay off. We don't have payments on our cars anymore, they are owned outright. We rent. God has blessed us financially. What I've come to realize as we slaughter the balance on my credit card is I was very sinful in how I spent my money. Not because I bought things, but why. I bought things to fix something. If I felt bad about myself, I'd buy a nice shirt on sale to make me feel better. If I was lonely, I would go eat with my friends. If I was bored, I'd buy a DVD or some new hockey stuff. I was trying to fix problems that were ultimately spiritual with solutions that were not. Stuff isn't supposed to fix or define us. I made my mistakes, and now we are paying for them.

we are finally home

2008-07-31T22:09:00.003-05:00

I have neglected the blog for a month again, but that being said, in the past month I've gotten married and moved across the country. We are finally home in Greenville, SC, and we love it. Our home is great, our church is great, the weather is great. We could not be more thankful for where God has led us. Also, I've had the chance to connect through twitter with two old co-workers who are now planting, Graham Prouty and Cecil Linke. Two VERY Godly men who are doing church to worship God, and not to make themselves famous. I look up to them both. I love my new boss Joel Tassie, and can't wait to be mentored by him as I seek to grow in ministry. My wife is amazing, and married life is great, I'm definitely learning how much I need to change to be a good husband. (i know Freeland, you could have told me that). But seriously, God has been showing me how I must continually die to myself to serve and lead my wife as Christ would have me. She is wonderful and I am so very blessed to be able to share her life. Our church softball team won our playoff game tonight, we are in the finals, and I'm going to sleep. Hopefully i'll be better about keeping this thing up.

When to stay and Fight

2008-06-30T10:52:00.000-05:00

Recently I joined the Anglican church. I had numerous seminary friends ask questions and express concerns over some of the widespread liberalism that has taken root in the episcopal (american anglican) church. I wholeheartedly echo those concerns. Orthodox anglicanism is a beautiful expression of distinct christianity with a high view of scripture being the inerrant authoritative word of God, a proper view on the person and work of Christ and a dedication to missions. Right now the episcopalian church (in some dioceses) has moved away from that. The press will tell you homosexuality is at the root of the controversy. It isn't. What lies at the heart of the issue is the authority and inerrancy of the bible. If the bible is authoritative, then we can't ordain homosexuals. But I'm not here to argue the authority of scripture right now. There are conservative, orthodox episcopalians. We are in the minority, but we do exist. The question for us right now is do I stay? The priest in charge of the church I'm going to had a long discussion with me about this before I ever took the job. He is a flaming conservative who loves dts and the reformers. What he said made me rethink my role in the situation. He said if all the conservatives leave, then who will fight for the Gospel in the church? That made me think about some of the stupid things we are willing to go to war for in the church. (Carpet, video screens, coffee, music, I could go on) if we are willing to go to war for all of this ansilary crap, why am I scared to stand up and fight for the thing that matters most? It could eventually cost me a job, but I'd rather lose that than my witness. This is one anglican who is not going to run from the fight. We have to get our view of scripture right as a denomination. We have to repent of our pride and humbly return to where we started, following in the steps of the disciple chasing Jesus Christ. I'm not leaving till they kick me out. I'm going to humbly cling to the truth of the Gospel and authority of the bible, while praying that my life makes a difference in the big picture of the direction of the church. I hope I'm not the only one.

Blessings in Disguise

2008-06-23T23:15:00.000-05:00

We have all had a boss we don't like. That gets awkward in ministry because if you work for a church then you have to like everyone, right? I've been lucky to have worked in 6 different churches before Christ Church, and in those six places, there was one guy I worked for who seemed to have it in for me from day one. Most conflict arises from unmet expectations, and I didn't meet his for what a pastor should be. I wasn't good enough for him and he made it clear. I would get irritated because he would be less than truthful with me at times, indirectly devalue me, my work and my ideas publicly, and on at least one occasion I was told about, ridiculed me in my absence. I picked up on his distaste and sinfully and wrongfully made the situation worse by being a jerk in my own indirect (sometimes not so indirect) way, and was an equal transgressor in the whole thing, and in no way a victim. Even so, the situation was the darkest, most discouraging season of ministry I have ever experienced. BUT, had God not led me there, I would not be as close to as equipped as I am to do ministry. Although our personalities clashed, my difficult boss is one of the most talented guys I've ever been around, and not just in a ministry context. He is freak show smart, and the most organized person I've ever seen. Basically, all the things I'm bad at he is incredible with. I learned more about how to plan and structure a ministry by watching this guy for a year then I did in six years of formal ministry education. I'm not a strategic, linear thinker, suck at math and don't like details. God has given me a position where I need to manage a large ministry and do some of the things I'm not good at. Before I worked for this guy I didn't know how to do that, after, I did. (at least a little better) As I begin working on some structure/orginization aspects of my new ministry, I'm using some of the same phrases he did. I read my plans and hear his voice in the words on the page. I learned the most about how to do ministry from the guy I liked the least (seriously, the least by a lot). Now that I'm removed from the situation and look back on it without my immature anger and pride blinding me, I'm thankful for this man God put in my life because I'm using the things I learned from him to spread the gospel.

I'm at a seamtresses shop, my life is different

2008-06-21T11:19:00.000-05:00

Kayleighs getting her dress taken in and I'm blogging. I played my last game with the hockey team last night, and I was reminded of all I'm leaving. I started to play on the hockey team when I was 19 and a sophomore in college. Now I'm 24 and getting married. Its a special group of guys I've been privilaged to play with.

I'm not married, and I'm not alone in Bed right now

2008-06-19T23:44:00.000-05:00

That's right, and what's more there is a female next to me......a 10 pound siamese cat named annabelle. My cohort in youth ministry at incarnation is out of pocket for the next 10 days so I'm house sitting for her as she has been kind to let kayleighs cats crash at her place until we move (long story involving housing policy at uta) and as I blog via sidekick, annabelle joined me in the sack. Big changes are happening. Kayleigh and I wed July 8th in Austin, then we move out to greenville. While we are excited to move, we will miss the wonderful Church we are leaving. While something as simple as housesitting, or opening your home up to a friends pets in need seems simple and small, it underscores a larger value of community found at Incarnation. There are a lot of bad things to say about a church nestled in the Park Cities, and a lot of them are deserved, but I have been both suprised and encouraged by the willingness to share and sacrifice I've seen modeled by the people I worship with. They are generous with their time, money and homes, transparent and accountable with eachother (for the most part) and truly seek to have a biblical community that loves and shapes its members towards the person of God. This week prepping for our mission trips, helping and being helped by fellow members has reminded me of the importance of strong community, and how God has worked in the community at Incarnation.

SO Busy!

2008-06-09T09:52:00.002-05:00

When I look at the last month, it's amazing how busy i've been, especially considering that I don't think I have that much going on right now. The main two things keeping me busy have been planning our move to Greenville and Writing our summer curriculum for an in depth Ephesians Study. The Ephesians study has been a great experience for me. Aside from the fact that I enjoy teaching the bible, the curriculum development has been especially challenging. I'm putting in about 8 hours of study a week on the section that is covered. That probably isn't enough, but it's all I have time for. That being said, I'm getting to read through commentaries, use Bible Works as well as a large bit of NT stuff from Seminary in a real ministry setting. It's way more fun to study and create for a ministry than for a class. The challenge has been to avoid getting caught in the numerous textual/grammatical issues presented in the text to the point that the message is lost. I want to challenge our students with a deep look at the book, but not to the point of overwhelming them and losing the focus of the text. The move...it's coming along. We'll be off to South Carolina mid-July. I've also got a wedding update, but I'll save that for later in the week.

Times they are a changin

2008-05-22T00:57:00.002-05:00

Life is a lot like the Dylan song right now. I think I have had the most hectic three weeks of my adult life. I finished up school, Kayleigh graduated from college (thanks Mark and Kelli), started planning a wedding (thanks again), moved out of my apartment-and took a four day trip to Greenville, SC with Kay for a job interview. Everything seemed to be a perfect fit from the time we landed until the time took off again to Dallas. We loved the city and the people, and we got the job. We couldn't be more excited, and are thanking God wholeheartedly for blessing us with the opportunity, and moving us to a new place of worship and ministry. This is a major step of faith for us because we are leaving Dallas (my home for a little over a decade now), planning a wedding over 932 miles away from where it will be held (still in Dallas), starting our lives together in a new place, and beginning ministry at a new church. God has been so good to us and we are anxious to get started. We will leave mid July, so we've got a touch over a month to get planning. (and find a truck in this country big enough to fit all of Kayleigh's shoe's in it and drag them cross country) Pray for us and our new community, I'll try and be better about keeping everyone updated on the move.

2008-05-05T10:17:00.000-05:00

Want to Be Disturbed?

2008-04-18T13:43:00.001-05:00

Google the words youth pastor and arrested.

Hedging Our Bets

2008-04-16T23:07:00.002-05:00

I've gotten into Vikings lately, I know it sounds weird, but I love history, and the hairy guys of the north don't get alot of attention, plus my heritage is swedish, so I've got a great x300 or so grandad who did some sweet pillaging and I want to know about it. Anyways, I was reading about the spread of Christianity to the norse people, and as they accepted Jesus, they would not give up their Odin, Thor and pagan God's, so if Christ didn't repsond to their needs in the time or manner they wanted, they'd put the cross away and get out the hammer. We replace the cross with some weird stuff also when Jesus doesn't do what we want. Kayleigh and I just got engaged and I couldn't be more excited We are planning a wedding and looking for jobs. I have some very clear ideas about what I want that to look like, and I'm struggling to keep from putting away the cross for something else if I don't get the response I want

Bad Directions

2008-03-24T19:51:00.002-05:00

I've lived in Dallas for about 13 years now. I don't get lost anymore. I don't get lost because I know where I'm going, and I know how to get there. If I had examine my life and pinpoint one thing that takes me away from God, and what he has for me, it's that sometimes I forget where I'm going. God hasn't shown me a vision where I see the next ten years like a sitcom or something, but what he has done is told me what my life is supposed to be like, or the direction it should go. I should be making a difference in people's lives. and not like the salvation army makes a difference. I'm supposed to be pointing people towards the gospel. How many people have been baptized because of how God used me in their lives? How many people have come to know Christ? And i've worked in churches since I was 18. The focus of my life isn't on what God wants me to do, it's on what I want to do.

I was honest..and I got burned

2008-03-23T23:35:00.006-05:00

I have to admit, I get discouraged when things don't go the way I want them. I am a planner, so when something doesn't go the way I plan it, I get pissed. I want things to go the way I think is best. This can be a problem because God knows what's best, and I'm wrong alot. So, I found an apartment because my lease is up in May (and a major life change will be taking place very soon, I'm not giving it away) and I will need a bigger place that is well liked by parties other than myself. And I found the perfect place. Here's the thing about Dallas; if you want a place in the city that doesn't look like they film the shield directly on the proprety, you should be prepared to pay about 9 dollars a square foot. I lucked out, and found a place in the industrial district, a loft, 1300 sq ft built in the 1920's, with hardwood floors, big windows, and less than 2 dollars a sq foot. How great is that? I will have a full time job from the day the lease starts on. The problem was/is, I don't now, and have no paperwork that documents my immenent raise. So I didn't get it. This was the first vacancy this place had in 2 years. If I would have lied on my application about my salary, I would've been home free. But I didn't. And I'm glad I didn't. The minor tests of character we face aren't minor at all. If you can't handle the details right, then you've got no shot at handling the things that really matter correctly. So, I don't have my dream place, but I do have my integrity. Thank God for his Grace imparted to me through the atoning work of Christ, without it, I am without integrity.

5 things I Couldn't live without

2008-01-11T12:53:00.000-06:00

1. coffee
2. laptop
3. cell phone
4. levis
5. bible (more idealistic than realistic, but i'm working on it)

Blessed Life

2008-01-03T10:03:00.000-06:00

I am a horrible person, and I've long neglected my blog-i think that's ok, because kayleigh is the only one who reads it, and she gets enough of my drivel on a person to person basis. My friends from school have started a co-op blog @ poultryfight.blogspot.com, so check it out, they are smarter than me, although I occasionally contribute (my posts are characterized by profanity laced tirades and nudity) Anyways, I'll be making more of an effort to keep this up and running this year. I spent Christmas in South Dakota with Kay's family and it was possibly the best Christmas I've ever had. I hear alot of people bemoan their signifigant others' family, and I feel blessed to have no idea where they are coming from. Aside from Kay's three wonderful sisters who are great to be around, her parents are two of the best people I've ever been around. I really respect the kind of father and husband her dad is, and I'll be lucky if I'm half of the guy he is. Her mother is one of the kindest people in the world, and makes it obvious as to where Kay gets her sweet disposition from. Her sisters are equally great. Lauren is exteremly talented, funny and smart, and has a really bright future in front of her, not matter what she decides to do. Madison is a great sister to Kayleigh, and one of the funniest people I've ever met. Hannah has more energy than one person probably should, but is still alot of fun. I feel very blessed to have these people in my life.

Jim Carey Pastors

2007-10-01T15:26:00.000-05:00

I'm recovering from a busy first half semester, and thought i'd get back to writing. (to kayleigh) hi sweetie. I'm a little tired. Now going on six years of formal biblical education and about as long interning and what not in various church positions--i'm tired. Specifically i'm tired of the masks. I'm really tired of self-righteous delusional power/attention hungry misfits who continually pimp out their God given calling to feel like the celebrity they'll never be. After continually seeing guys playing the role of super christian ultra leader while ignoring the evident crap going on in their own life, it's like the 5 year old who thinks he can fly because he's wearing a 15$ halloween costume. It's cheap, fake and easy to recognize. The scary thing about it is, these guys actually think they're super heroes, then they get shot at and the bullets don't bounce off. And the entire kingom of God suffers. Let's all stop, take off our masks and knock off the act. It's repulsive and embarassing.

things fall apart

2007-08-09T12:38:00.000-05:00

its been an interesting week. aside from my girlfriend leaving me (to go to south daktoa for 10 days to see her awesome family-but i had you going there didn't i?) all this stuff in my life has started to break. At the beginning of the week my laptop stopped working. I took it in to best buy where they did whatever it is that they do to figure out what's wrong with it-and it turns out it has a bad hard drive. They sent it off to be fixed and i'll have it back in two weeks. I had no idea how much i used that thing until it was gone. i think life works that way with alot of things. Then monday night i found my drivers' side tire was jacked up. Not a hard fix, but still, inconvienience in waves. I wish my life worked the way it was supposed to all the time, but that rarely seems to happen .

Explosions and Marriages

2007-07-25T14:55:00.000-05:00

I was a little freaked out today when my roomate called from Atlanta and asked me if our apartment blew up. I came to find out there was a gas explosion in downtown dallas about 10 minutes down Elm Street from my apartment. (my place is fine) As I was on cnn.com trying to see if I still had a home, I noticed that most of the headlines in the news seemed to center around celebrities doing blow and cheating on their spouses. I looked around the sight and saw that most of the focus of the american public seems to be on celebrities and their relationships. Maybe if we payed as much attention to our marriages as we did to Tom Cruises' the landscape of the American family would be a little different. Rant over, llamas are funny.

Murray Street Coffee

2007-07-13T14:15:00.000-05:00

My routine is a big part of my day. My life works better when I follow some sort of routine and things are organized-whether those two things are happening or not is usually a pretty good barometer of how i'm doing spiritually. Anways, recently I've added a significant piece to that routine-My coffee addiction is now fed by the amazing people at Murray Street Coffee in deep ellum. This place is amazing and embodies what it takes to succeed at anything. It has the following going for it:

1.) It's close to my apartment (i live about 6 blocks north)

2.) It's unique/not a chain (the people who own it live locally and pour their souls into this place)

3.)They serve illy's coffee (they produce a quality product)

4.) The atmosphere inside (great interior-makes me want to stay there)

This place drips of excellence in everything they do, from how they serve the customer, to the look and feel of their space, to how plugged in they are to their surrounding community, they do the impossible daily-make me look foward to waking up so I can stop by, soak in the atmosphere and get some illys and a danish.

Murray Street Coffee

Lay Down Your Weapons Boy

2007-07-12T12:16:00.000-05:00

I've been listening to what has become my favorite band alot recently. They're called the daylights, and i first heard them when I was a summer intern at Riverbend Church in Austin. They're out of LA and are gaining a ton of momentum. Anyways, i'm stuck on they're track "weapons" right now. The chorus goes:

lay down, lay down your weapons boy

right now right now, you're gonna change the world

I think this speaks to me beacuse it reveals something i struggle with alot. I've always been an agressive guy-i like collision sports, violent movies and explosions. I also like to fight. It sounds weird, but if there is something i feel is wrong, or i disagree with i default to search and destroy, usually verbally and not physically, but still--if i feel like someone is coming after me or something i believe in i want to jack them up. And that is completely opposed to what Jesus called me to. We can't effect change in our culture when we're fighting (eachother or the culture itself) I'm very guilty of mocking christian subculture (even when it earns it) and it's counter productive. It's like football players hitting guys on their own team. Anyways, before I really start to make a difference I need to lay down all my weapons and love people. Great song, can't wait for the cd to come out. Show the daylights some love--

http://www.myspace.com/thedaylights

Coffee and Jesus

2007-07-11T14:29:00.000-05:00

Our Church [attempts] to provide starbucks' coffee every sunday for our attenders. We average about 1500 people a weekend (this fluctuates up some and a little down some) and I only mention the attendance to present a frame of reference for exactly how much coffee we're talking about here. We have a starbucks system that will crank out two gallons in six minutes, and be ready to go again in 4. However, we have had a huge problem keeping up with demand. We run out of coffee before everyone who wants a cup gets one. It's a huge enhancement of our church's first impression to have coffee, but it would be better to not have it all than have an empty shuttle frustrating people. Excellence lies in the details. As we look to improve this function of the church, making the details work will increase the quality of the experience we provide for people. Any ideas?

also, we are going through a series on identity at FBCN right now-and Drew is doing an awesome job. along those lines, i got this link from Tony Morgan's Blog on personality. Here are my results-give it a try, who are you?

http://www.personaldna.com/report.php?k=EbsyOlelmyCEyOr-DM-ADDED-12a1&u=9ebd5e83279b

Creating Impact

2007-07-06T14:03:00.000-05:00

It's been awhile since I've posted (finals), but i made it through them, and even passed Greek. The adult team from fellowship got back from the Buzz conference in DC last week, and it was impacting to say the least. The conference struck me in that it was so much more than here is a list of things to do to make your church big, and delved into the mindset and motivation behind minsitry and the church's relationship to culture. I began to think about what I want my ministry to be charcterized by. I kept coming back to the word impact. I want what I do to change my surroundings, have a lasting effect. The "why" of these things that impacted me came down to the same few characteristics: Quality, Creativity and Authenticity. Three things invaluable to anything we do in life. Speaking of things that effect my life, here's a picture of my girfriend kayleigh and myself on her birthday. (I know, i don't know what she's doing with me either)

Who do you want to be?

2007-04-10T18:14:00.000-05:00

I should be studying for a greek test I have to ace tommorow if i want to pass, but I'm engrossed in the play i've been watching for the last 20 minutes or so. I'm not at a theatre, I'm in the "coffee shop" at seminary. Watching people is funny, especially seminary students. Especially single seminary students. Throw a halfway attractive girl, screw that, just a girl you can look at with the lights on, put her in a room with single seminary guys and it's like chum in shark infested water. Most guys seeking a girls attention or even affection will you know, talk to her. Get to know her, ask her out. Apparently, we do things a little differently here at DTS. Guys turn into peackocks (i know i can't spell) and put on these weird little shows for them. They'll talk really louldy on their cell phones and make sure everyone can hear their conversation, which is important enough that it should impress the rest of us. They are putting out a picture of who they want people to see them as (ie the tool telling everyone about his prestigous career as a college football player, which, btw seems tough to believe when a guy's 5'7 250, but whatever) As much as i enjoy mocking these morons, it makes me think about how much i have in common with them. I don't mean i'm going to start pimping out my God given calling to get dates with studious church girls, but i definanlty have an idea of who i want to be, and the type of reputation i want to carry around with me. I know the type of man God calls all of us to be in scripture, especially those seeking positions of leadership in his church. And i'm down with that, i aspire so strongly to be patient, wise, prayerful, GODLY. and my heart longs to be a good husband and father......but here's the thing-as good as all that stuff sounds, the work it takes to get there sucks, and it's easy to get distracted. Honestly, sometimes i'd rather have alot of friends than take a hard stand on something. Sometimes i'd rather hang out with a girl who likes to mess around more than she likes jesus. I'm not saying i actually do, but what i want to do and what i should do don't always jive. also, i'm not patient, i get angry, and bitter at the church, and sometimes it's hard for me to love people I don't like. (and most of them seem to be church people) Fortunantly, God has given me numerous examples both in scripture and in my life that model the kind of men and pastors i want to be. My friend old rick at seminary is 33. He as a great looking family, a wife and two daughters. He models the sacrificial love towards his family and sheperds them towards God. Rick is the kind of dad and husband i want to be. Jason Ganze is my mentor. he's the high school pastor at a church here in dallas and loves Jesus and his family. I want to be Jason, anything good I am I learned from him. I have a friend from college, dan. Dan is one of the most mature, hardest working people I know. I hope to imitate the kind of humble Godly leader he is. Jack, one of the pastors at Fellowship where I work is someone i personally look up to and identify with. He exemplifies how to be a Godly leader and manage the direction of a church. The thing that sucks for us is to be the people we want to be, we have to give up alot about the people we are, and it's almost always long, and always painful.

I want to be a spartan

2007-03-19T15:51:00.000-05:00

I saw the 300 this weekend. I dont need to tell you i thought it was great. I'm devoid of anything thoughtful or spiritual that i feel the need to spew onto the masses, so i'm defaulting to violence and testosterone. I don't know how to spell testosterone. Anyways, if you're a guy, go see the movie, i'm pretty sure you'll love it. Violence, honor, and violence. It's a great movie, unfortunantly there are a few sex scences that prevent it from being a wholesome family event.

Mexican Food

2007-03-14T10:40:00.001-05:00

I like Mexican food alot. I have a good friend who likes mexican food maybe more than I do. Naturally, when we hang out, Mexican food is usually involved. We were eating at one of our favorite places last night, and I was reminded something about good friendships. They are like a mirror; they reflect who we are in our good points and our bad ones. I don't always think about things before i say them (a promising trait for someone who wants to preach). Flash back to fajita nachos and bbq shrimp. I said something stupid. She didn't laugh. In fact, it's something that's been bugging her in our friendship for awhile. So we started to talk about it, and it turns out that something i thought was harmless had been creating a wedge in the relationship, making it hard for there to be health, and even making it difficult for her to trust me. I don't take alot of things seriously, but close friendships are pretty important to me, and i sat at the table speechless. (something else that doesn't happen alot) And hurt. I had no idea any of this was going on. I apologized, and we had a great dinner. But when i saw a reflection of who i was, i wanted to vomit. The reason God calls us into community is because 1.) we need it. and 2.) it helps us grow spiritually. We need people that love us enough to help us. I'm not talking about being overly critical, but encouraging us to be the people that God wants us to be. I know the kind of husband and father I want to be, but i have habits, bends, and issues that stand in the way of who i am now and who i hope one day to be. Thankfully i have friends who risk comfort to point out the junk i need to clean out and friendships strong enough to create the safety for that kind of risk to be taken. It's not pleasant, i still feel crappy about being a jerk to someone i value so highly, but i would have felt alot worse if my junk would've gone unchecked and eventually jacked up not only that friendship, but all those after it.

The Craig Miller Theory

2007-03-12T16:47:00.000-05:00

I live amongst celebrities. I mean, on a daily basis, i'm surrounded by them. I've heard it said before, but it finally clicked the other day. I was in the verrrry trendy part of Dallas called uptown this past weekend for a birthday thing (uptown is populated by guys with a ton of cash, and impossibly attractive young women who are dating the cash...i'm sorry i meant to say the guys with cash, that was a slip, men are shallow while women are deep, sincere, and only care about personality) and in the midst of the yuppie expanse, I realized the mastadon stunning accuracy of the Craig Miller theory: I live amongst movie stars. The Craig Miller Theory was spawned on the Dunham and Miller Morning Show (KTCK 1310 AM) here in Dallas. Craig observed one day while talking about the atrocious driving habits of Dallasites that most people exist as the stars of their own movie. Every life experience is simply a part of the plot, and the rest of exist as supporting actors. Maybe this is just a dallas thing, but it is readily apparent that I live in a city of people whose world (and everyone in it) revolves around them. And don't get me wrong, the movie stars provide as much entertainment as they do annoyance. From the guy working his bluetooth while his beamer caromes down 75 blaring Dave Matthews "Ants Marching" to the emo/rockers who are vehemently rebelling against society and conformity by staunchly expressing their indiviuality (while all dressing and speaking exactly alike......) these self-absorbed stars and starlets make us laugh. The Craig Miller theory is far less funny and far more dangerous when it creeps it's way into the church. At seminary, i've seen countless guys whose "ministry" is simply another medium to brodcast a show about themselves. As Christians, we make God our supporting actor, or director. We live in a culture that is feeding us the idea that everything is about us, and we are choking on it. I see it in my own life as much as I do anywhere. The show isn't about us, it's about God, and as Christians, we are called to model that through a lifestyle of radical, sacrificial love and holiness. It's hard for me to model a life that demonstrates the creation is ulitmately about God when I keep putting myself first. The church is dying because we are making church what it does for us instead of what it can do for God. I'm not suggesting the church shut down production of the movie, we just need to keep in mind who the main character is.

what am i doing

2007-03-08T10:54:00.000-06:00

I've never been big into blogging, probably because i'm marginally computer illiterate (sometimes i need our it guy to help me check my email) and probably because I just never really spent a ton of time infront of the computer. The underlying narcissim of writing one's own thoughts with the vain expectation that others will read them and give a flip isn't lost on me, and is probably a subconcious motivator for me, an only child dripping with narcissim. I really got turned on to it when I started reading my fellow intern Chris "Purple Zebra" Freeland's blog. At first I wasn't too sure about it, but I like reading what he has to say, and get alot out of it. Hopefully any overflow of my cranial porridge into this blog will be worth the time it's taking to do this. We'll see what happens.